People always tell me how lucky I am. If they only knew the truth, maybe they would back off. I\u2019m starting to wonder if this is that special day, where it all turns around for me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I hang my head, lost in thought, glued to my chair on my back porch. The light from the distant mountains, climbs over the edge. As the early morning, ray of sunlight blares in my direction. The brightness brings a moment of warmth and hope. The last year of my life has been confusing to say the least. I wonder sometimes, how I\u2019ve even gotten here.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Not since those days, before Megan (my wife) left me. Had life, been easy. Or did I feel valued or constantly loved. Life has gotten a little better, but it was never like before.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m not the kind of guy that goes real deep in his feelings. But, on the real, I was hoping this morning, if I did. I might discover some hidden answers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As I tilt my head in an upward position, the beautiful multicolored Arizona sky put\u2019s on a display as it showcases its mystic beauty. For a moment I let my guard down (I stop worrying) and it feels damn good.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Chill from the cold early morning air has me shivering as a family of baby quail sing out as they run across the yard in unison trying to keep up with their mother. The sound of their voices, brings me back to that familiar place. The times, that me and my wife had sat on this very porch together. I can\u2019t get her out of my head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Honestly, my mind is all over the place. As it usually is these days. Reminiscing, why and how I got here? My troubling thoughts have me second guessing myself. I\u2019m determined to turn things around.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I hear a sound like my door is opening, then out of nowhere I hear a voice,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cGood morning, Noah.\u201d I instinctively stand up, as I turn my head in the direction, where the voice is coming from. I\u2019m surprised to see Jackie (my ex), at my house so early.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cGood morning.\u201d I said, as I smiled gently.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI know its early, Noah. How are you! Do you have that money; you owe me for child support, this month. I wanted to catch-up with you before I went to work.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSure.\u201d I nodded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh by the way, I made you a cup of steaming hot coffee, just the way you like it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThanks Jackie.\u201d I reach over as she hands me the cup of coffee. I set it down, on the porch, on the side of my chair. Since I did not have a table to put it on. Then I slowly sank into my chair.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou feeling, okay this morning Noah?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYeah.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAlso, I need you to stop by the house today and work on my car, then fix the dryer.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh, okay.\u201d I look in her direction. I think to myself, this seems like it\u2019s been an almost everyday occurrence; since I\u2019ve been back on vacation. I need to get away from her, as soon as possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jackie gives me a half smile, turns around and walks back through the door.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I watch her enter the house. This woman refuses to back off; it\u2019s been one thing after another with her. She is the mother of my son, this has made our relationship very stressful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jackie is trying hard to create a serious relationship between the two of us, again. We were close friends while we were growing up. Our relationship had always been complicated, maybe that\u2019s why we have a kid together. I really care for her and my son, but, our relationship has caused me a great deal of problems, with Megan. If I\u2019m honest with myself, she is the reason Megan left me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jackie\u2019s persistent need to always want to involve me in her life, is a handful to say the least. \u201cI slowly reach behind my chair and grab my bottle of whisky.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I shake my head wondering. How in the world, am I going to keep a friendship with Jackie (the mother of my child) and a marriage with Megan?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I slowly pour the whisky into my coffee cup and begin sipping my much needed freshly brewed, steaming hot coffee. Coffee and whisky let\u2019s just say, it has become my morning drink. For, just a moment. I feel at ease, as I enjoy my whisky and coffee.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
People always tell me how lucky I am. If they only knew the truth, maybe they would back off. I\u2019m starting to wonder if this is that special day, where it all turns around for me. I hang my head, … Continue reading