The Royal Minister of Defense, dressed in all his formal attire, requests permission to see King Marduk, who is still in his bedchamber. “Please, I must speak to the King. It is urgent. Let him know I am here.”
The attendant returns and announces, “Royal Minister of Defense Grand Marshall Dieman may enter.”
Rushing into the gigantic bedroom, he sees the King fully dressed sitting in his chamber settee. “Greetings, Sire, I have tidings for your decision.”
The King rolls his eyes and speaks with a deep voice, “Grand Marshall, please sit down and tell me what is so important that you need to come to my chambers.”
“Yes, Sire, the army has surrounded the village of Simpleton, where your former advisor, Junior Timi Dee, was born, and his family still resides. Before giving the order to advance and flatten and salt the earth of the village and decimate all who live there, I wished to confirm if this is still your order, Sire.”
The King sits, staring at the wall of his chambers, reminiscing about all the good times he recalls from the village and the people of Simpleton. It would be such a shame to kill everyone. “Grand Marshall, why would you hesitate? My orders were clear: kill everyone, burn their bodies, and salt the earth upon which every home stands.”
The Grand Marshall stands. “Of course, Sire, I just wanted to make sure before giving the final go-ahead, since you did commute Junior Timi Dee’s death sentence from cutting off his head to cutting off one foot and one hand and all of his tongue.”
The King, speaking angrily, said, “Sit down, don’t be in such a hurry, I am still thinking.” Of course, I want them killed, burned, and the grounds salted, but on the other hand, I know so many of the people of the village, and I like them. What should I do? I can’t be seen as a weak leader.
The King, smiling and laughing, said, “Grand Marshall, how are you at playing rock, paper, scissors?”
Grand Marshall, confused, “Ah, well, in fact, I played it as a child and always seemed to lose.” “Let’s play three sets. If I win 2 out of three, then my order stands. If you win 2 out of three, then I will pardon them. However, if I win three out of three, then they will receive the same sentence as Junior Timi Dee. If you win 3 out of three, then they will only have their tongues removed.”
